Archive

It's been ages since I've had an email conversation tagged as 'Distraction' sitting in my Inbox. Let's see till when it remains sitting there before I archive it.

And then read it over and over again.

Flashback

It is often said that just before you die, your whole life flashes past you in a second. And I always thought that this statement made no sense as its truth could never be verified. Until recently.

As I lay bleeding and mangled on the expressway, hovering somewhere between the thin line separating life and oblivion, for a second I caught a glimpse of you. 

I don't know what this means. Was it the sum total of what my life had been till then? Or maybe, just maybe, what it could have been?

Joy

I scanned the crowds for a glimpse of you. It would be my first of you. After a long time. The last one being when I bid you farewell on this same crowded railway FOB. The evening sky was dark with ominous looking rain clouds.

Though it was a short reunion, I still remember that pure look of joy on your face when you saw me, that small gentle exclamation of happiness you gave when I surprised you from out of nowhere.

It never rained that evening though. 

And I never saw that look again.

Dreamer...

You looked at me from across the dinner table, resplendent in a light gold saree, and asked me to a smile. And the cynic in me only asked, "Why?"

And then I woke up.

(PS: I hope early morning dreams come true.)

Bombay rains...

Everyday, as I drive back home in these Bombay rains, I trace your name on the misted up windshield. And watch it slowly disappear, before my very eyes, as the air conditioner makes its effect felt. 

It feels like one moment you were there and gone the next. 

Smile...

It was one of those evenings when I was walking you home. Rush hour traffic all around, as could only be seen in your part of the city. But we walked together, oblivious to it all, our conversations veering from one topic to another, at random and with ease.

Suddenly, in the middle of all that chaos around us, you stopped, took a coin from your wallet and tossed it up. I could not catch whether you said heads or tails, the noise around us took care of that. Then you handed me the coin and started walking again, nonchalant, while I pestered you to tell me what all that was about. 

I still remember the smile that played on your lips. To this day, and its been a long time since, I don't know what all that was about. 

Wish you were here...

A moment of happiness but no one to share with. A swirling mass of humanity but still a lonely drive back home. A feeling of peace but a rough edge too. 

And a wish...a wish that you were here.